I work with a wonderful older woman who is profoundly deaf. I help out with her laundry and cleaning but mostly I listen to her talk. She can still talk but can’t see too well anymore. I asked her why she didn’t get glasses and she dismissed the idea. Her doctor didn’t think it was worth it as her eyes are getting worse she has to have eye drops but why bother. I think these are just excuses and told her so. I think it’s a shame she denies herself a better quality of life but don’t we all?
I do it all the time but when I see other people do it, it drives me crazy. It got me to thinking that I don’t have the right to nag Helen to improve her life if I’m not willing to do the same for myself. As a variation of the Golden Rule we should inspire our own life before we can inspire others.
How many times have we denied ourselves a gift, a day off or a simple pleasure because we didn’t think we deserved it? I’m not suggesting self indulgence as much as self care. I have no problem treating a friend to lunch or doing a favor for them and nor should I stop doing those things but it’s important for us to remember ourselves in the equation of caring.
Even that bombast Dr. Phil has it right “ You can’t give away what you don’t have.”. Instead we berate and begrudge our own spiritual well being out of the socially ingrained puritanical notion of self denial and guilt.
Well knock it off or I’ll come over and nag you about being good to yourself.
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