How to End Wars

 

      

   Humans have dealt with conflicts for centuries with war and it's about time we stop this shit. I have a idea to resolve conflict that is easier, cheaper and most importantly, doesn't involve killing mass amount of innocent people just trying to live.

         Mud wrestling. Each side choices a champion, there will men and women's divisions because women do represent half the population you know, the winner will be determined on a point system by judges of grandmas from neutral countries. The competition will start with snacks for the crowd-no alcohol please, and 30 minutes of cat videos to put everyone in the right mood before the main event. All fighting between parties will halt for five years until the next games. It'll be like the Olympics only with a better pay off. Broadcast the show and the ratings will be awesome. Is this silly? Of course it is but that's the point.

         We need to get together and petition the UN with this idea to end warfare over religion, real estate, and power hungry politicians grandstanding.

    

 

 

 

 

Laugh It Up

 

    Humor. We have lost the ability to laugh at each other. Gentle poking, seeing the silliness of it all, mocking the pompous has been lost to toxic judgment.

Pointing out ethnic or cultural differences is seen as insensitive, thanks to political correctness, but laughing at differences is a way of reducing them to just another quirk, nothing to worry about. We really are all the same but the current trend insist we focus on differences like it's a threat.

    Laugh at the loud boors who behave like stuffy parents scolding smart ass kids. Laugh at the hypocrisy in politics, poke fun at the emperor who has no clothes.

Instead we harass and punish the class clowns, comedians, and court jesters who remind us to stop being so serious. Life is a joke, sometimes a big fat screaming ironic one and sometimes delightfully silly.

    When we focus on our ego trips, we need to be reminded that none of this is real.

So take aim at cultural, racial, or religious stereotypes because they are silly and insignificant. Point and laugh at sexism, body shaming and gender politics that try to separate us from, you know, them when we are all in the same wading pool of shit.

    Laughter will set you free.

 

The Laws of Nature

 

    There are certain rules in life, like Murphy's Law, that are guaranteed and more common. Like the bad fairies that make things disappear only to reappear later when you don't need them. The next time you find yourself  bored--watch out--you will too busy the next week.

    The weather will be perfect when you plan a vacation, especially one that includes outdoor activities, then it will be a hellscape of torrential rain or you'll be sick in bed. For years my period would come along for any trip regardless of it's normal clock like schedule.  

    If you drop something on the floor, it will roll to the most inaccessible spot. If you are waiting for an important phone call, it will come when you are nowhere near a phone. Bonus points for being on the toilet when it comes.

    Should your printer, computer or major appliance break down, you get  an important notice in the mail or have an emergency-it will happen at 5 pm on a Friday.

    The rules are not Earth shaking, karmatic or life threatening but just  annoying enough to disrupt any peace you wanted.

    Have a nice weekend.