A Hole in the Heart of Eugene

"Save the hole! Save the hole!"

I love the hole. It’s an empty cement pit in downtown Eugene that used to be the Sears store before they moved out to the mall. For a couple of years afterwards it was a sad eyesore of a building. Sprayed with graffiti; a ghastly blight on the urban landscape. Then, in a sudden burst of desperate development the city (which owns the property) had it torn down leaving an open wound. Every week when I go to work at the library across the street I am stirred by this barren existential monument.

But wait! The city of Eugene and developers are looking at the downtown with grand plans for it’s future. This has to be stopped. If hole is to remain deserted and ugly, any half hearted, spendy attempts to improve it must be stopped.

Like the other hole on Willamette street it is vital the Hole remain a symbol of poor city planning it so eloquently represents. We can not allow another miscued ploy to create a bustling, lively environment for people to live or stroll about on a warm summer night. A place where art galleries and cafes thrive to bring folks to the center of town. Oh no.

We can not allow the library, bus depot and the MacDonald theatre to be swamped with desirability. It would put an end to the complaining and sarcasm if brighter minds got their way. We must maintain the whiny, backward, loser mentality that is the hallmark of Eugene.

Better yet as someone at the library wondered “Wouldn’t it be ironic if Sears bought the property and built another store there.” Now there’s the kind of irony we need around here. Besides the hole is fine as it is. The city could put a sign on the cyclone fence offering canoes rides when it fills with rainwater and make some money off of it or simply use it as a convenient garbage dump.

Next week the Willamette Street hole.