Stubborn Turtle: The Big Trip Part 3

A photo of Mike taking a photo. Provenance.

Beach Blanket Bingo

I know some of the beach combers as old friends and they all know Mike. The party is ruled over by Brenda- a cross between a den mother and a drill sergeant. She is married to John who lived next door when we were kids. The rest of the party requires a flow chart to figure who is who and how they are related. It doesn't matter, everyone is chummy and gets along.

John and his son John Jr. have theirs boats offshore along with two jet skis. I looked forward to a ride on one with Mike but it turned out to be too much fun for me. As we turned back to the beach we were dumped off by the choppy waters and I frantically splashed my way back to shore. As I stand in the surf embarrassed and sobbing Brenda comes wading out to comfort me in my acute wimpyness.

It really does look like fun.

I decide on going to Waldameer Amusement Park with Bonnie is safer- until we get on the Ravine Flyer II roller coaster. I don't like heights, can't scream like a girl and-

"Look at the view of the lake," Bonnie chirps as we crest the hill above the trees. I'm not interested in the view-oh shit, I shut my eyes as we plunge down the hill and open them just as we hurl across the bridge over Presque Isle Drive. The next minute and a half is fast, loud and intense.

I preferred the steel dragon, a smaller coaster where the car spins around along a tightly wound track. Bonnie enjoys every minute, giggling like a little kid. I'm a bit woozy and tired from it all. This will all be repeated on Monday with the fearless family kids, groan.

The coaster is a little too close to the campers below the hill.

Before going to bed, I go to the camp bathroom and notice the lake is agitated, the waves are loud, exasperated sighs as they crash on the shore. That's not a good sign and I wonder where the storm is coming from. The next morning I am greeted with rain as I go to my morning toilet. Dark clouds and a curtain of rain race across the lake.

"Hey you missed the lightening and a rainbow." Mike informs me on my return. Oh thanks for telling me I missed a great photo op, asshole.

A morning storm rolls across the lake.

The storm passes, the skies clears, but lake never calms down. This doesn't deter Mike when he takes his six year old granddaughter Morgan out on the jet ski, who enjoys it immensely. Mike regales me later while Brenda is appalled. I am officially a total wimp.

The grand finale to the weekend is the fireworks show put on by Waldameer and the camp site is right below it. Mike is given to exaggerate at times but he wasn't kidding about bits of debris raining down on us during the show. I watched in awe as the glow of the finale reflected off the dark water.

An edifice is visited by a mysterious lake creature. Also known as Wyatt Daniels.

Lake Erie is barely great, it's the southernmost, shallowest, and smallest by volume of the Great Lakes, it's deepest spot is only 210 feet and a mere 57 miles wide but it has enough personality to entertain and as the weather proved, can be fearsome. The sunsets are picturesque, and at night, it intrigues me.

To one side is the clutter of camping, tiki lights and camp fires, to the other side, an ominous blank. The waves scrape at the edge of the solid wall of blackness and I wonder, what if this was a boundary to another dimension? My imagination leaps at the possibilities.

I get another drink and join the late night group sitting around the camp fire telling joke and thanks to an old friend who told me every joke he knows I kill at the contest.

A priest, rabbi and an iman are sitting around comparing their work.

"Say is it true you guys don't eat bacon? " the priest asks. They assure him it's true. "oh come on, you've never had it?" he can't believe that.

"I had a BLT once, it was no big deal," the rabbi admits.

"Yeah, I tried bacon and eggs it was ok," the iman admits. "What about your celibacy, you never been with a woman?" he retorts. The priest shakes his head but they persist.

" Ok before I took my vows I did sow my wild oats" he finally confesses. The rabbi and iman exchange looks.

"Sure beats bacon, doesn't it?"