Friday, November 20

What time is it? What day is it? What Century?

I'm supposed to be going to aikido fall camp this weekend. I'm supposed to be doing volunteer work at the library. I'm supposed to be having a life. None of it is possible while trying to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. It has consumed all my time. Even if I'm not actually sitting at the desk writing, every moment I'm running errands or taking care of all the little matters of life I am composing in my head. I lie in bed and can't sleep because that part of my brain that writes is distracting me.

"You know you could move that characters speech to the-"

"Shhh, I'm trying to sleep." Is say as I adjust the pillow.

"Oh sorry, right. Before you fall off to slumber land what about the conflict between Big Joe and his son on page-"

"Yeah I'll deal with it tomorrow." I say as I turn on my right side.

"This will only take a minute." the writer insists.

"Will you shut the fuck up and let me sleep." I snarl as fatigue overtakes me.

This is what it is like inside a writer's head aren't you glad you didn't ask?

I thought this would be easy. Knock out 2,000 words in two or three hours and have the rest of the day free. Not a chance and it's driving me crazy. When I started I worried there wasn't enough time. Now I can't wait until the time is up like a convict marking off the days until he's released. If I can remember what day it is.

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